Email Counselling

a neon lit email sign

The first stage of email counselling may take some time, as any movement forward depends on the extent and clarity of the information shared between the client and the therapist.

In the case of the free initial consultation via email, the clients will need to fill out a form and outline their main concerns.

The first email response you receive from the therapist will involve exploration of your concerns in an effort to fully understand your experience of it.

Once the key concerns are identified, we begin to work on each of them. The counsellor may teach you skills and techniques to help you manage your distress better, or may recommend some appropriate books, send you articles or videos that can help you better understand your situation.

Every session is structured in the following way:

an image of a banknote paying for therapy flying to the right

The client sends the payment before commencing the therapeutic email exchange (an exchange is understood as 1 email sent from the client and 1 response sent from the therapist).

email counselling email being sent from the left to the right

The therapist will invest 25-30 minutes in carefully responding to the client’s email.

email counselling email being sent from right to left

The clients invest the same amount of time (25-30 minutes) writing their email.

Please note: I will try to be very clear in my response, and if there is any confusion about something I wrote, please send me an immediate and short email so we can attempt to clarify the misunderstanding. Please put ‘CLARIFICATION’ in your subject line so there is no confusion about what specific email is a session exchange and what email is just clarification.

Tips for Email Counselling

the title 'The Black Hole Effect' getting sucked in to a black hole

This refers to the uncomfortable phenomenon of sending an email and never knowing if it has been received or acknowledged, leading to: uncertainty about what to do next, guessing about what has potentially happened, self-doubt about not being important enough for the other person to bother to reply back and finally potentially leading to resentment towards the other person for not having replied back. It can even lead to mild paranoia (the sender of the original email feeling to be blamed): Did I forget to send the message? Maybe I should check my outbox?

This phenomenon can bring about the following feelings:

For the client: fears of abandonment or despair, waiting for the counsellor to respond.

For the counsellor: second guessing if they have said or done anything wrong and feeling de-skilled as a therapist.

The ways this phenomenon applies to therapy could be the following:

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